• GraniteM@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    There’s a crowdsourced full-length Shakespearean translation of Pulp Fiction called Bard Fiction, and it’s quite good.

    JULIUS

    Forsooth, did I thy concentration break? Continue, please! Thou did, methinks, now speak Of our ill will. But now thy tongue is still? Allow me, then, to offer a retort. Describe to me Marsellus Wallace, pray.

    BRITTANUS

    What?

    JULIUS

    In which far land did thou first come to be?

    BRITTANUS

    What?

    JULIUS

    Thou sayest thou dost hail from distant What! I know but naught of thy strange country What. Which language speak they in the land of What?

    BRITTANUS

    What?

    JULIUS

    English, base knave, dost thou speak it?

    BRITTANUS

    Aye!

    JULIUS Then my words are not Greek to thy dull ears.

    BRITTANUS Nay!

    JULIUS Then hearken to my words and answer them! Describe to me Marsellus Wallace!

    BRITTANUS What?

    JULIUS (Holds his blade pointed at Brittanus’ eye) Speak “What” again! Thou cur, cry “What” again! I dare thee utter “What” again but once! I dare thee twice and spit upon thy name! Now, paint for me a portraiture in words, If thou hast any in thy head but “What”, Of Marsellus Wallace!