• IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    4 months ago

    Car stops on the street in front of the house … Garrison at attention!!!

    Car starts backing up towards the driveway … All forces on high alert! Man your stations!!!

    Car starts moving onto the driveway … Cease all operations!! Men at your stations!!! We’re dispatching a warning party!!!

    Car drives away … Cancel all alerts!!! Go back to your patrols!

  • Nougat@fedia.io
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    4 months ago

    How did you get such a clear picture of me? <looks out the window for a camera>

    • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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      4 months ago

      Same here, I even live very urban, essentially right in the heart of the city. I still catch myself disapprovingly eyeing people walking by my windows on occasion. Am I getting old?

  • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
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    4 months ago

    Or the opposite. “Howdy! Need directions? i just cleaned the grill and that clicking sound is the boot on your passenger-side CV joint.”

    • jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      I’m the guy in the neighborhood where the conversations go like this:

      Them: “Hey jubilationtcornpone, do you have a tool for doing [obscure DIY job] and if so, can I borrow it?”

      Me: “Oh yeah, I have one of those. Sure, you can borrow it.”

      Them: “Ha! That’s awesome. I just knew you’d have one. How do you even figure out how to use all those tools?”

      Me: “You start by being too poor or too cheap to pay someone else to do it correctly.”

      • Buelldozer@lemmy.today
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        4 months ago

        If you don’t start off poor then you start by being too cheap to trust someone else to do it correctly. When you get older you graduate to not TRUSTING someone else to do it correctly. That leads to you being poor because you start spending a zillion dollars on tools.

    • MajorHavoc@programming.dev
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      4 months ago

      I’ve met this guy. He was awesome. He made great food. And the clicking sound from my car was, indeed, exactly what he said.

  • doublejay1999@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I’m lucky enough to have a driveway and can confirm it is sovereign land awarded to me by God.

    However, I have not yet reached the age where I conduct active patrols of the border, like the even older dads across the street have done.

  • downpunxx@fedia.io
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    4 months ago

    If you’re quick about it, no problemo friendo If you stop, for any length of time, for any reason short of medical emergency, we’ve got a problem

  • RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Nobody has any legitimate reason to ever pull all the way onto someone else’s driveway, unless they are having a medical emergency or they are the guest of the homeowner.

    If you are neither of those, it is really easy to just not drive onto someone’s driveway. You can do.a three point turn in the street without your tires ever going onto a driveway.

    And if you happen to be parked in my driveway when I return home, I will park my car to block you on my driveway. You wanted it so bad, you can stay there for the night. Like the Naughty Corner, or a Dunce Cap.

    • Buelldozer@lemmy.today
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      4 months ago

      Nobody has any legitimate reason to ever pull all the way onto someone else’s driveway

      C’mon now…

        • samus12345@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          Nobody has any legitimate reason to ever pull all the way onto someone else’s driveway, unless they are having a medical emergency or they are the guest of the homeowner.

          It’s still ridiculous, unless it’s some massively long driveway. As long as they only stop long enough to switch gears and start moving out, there’s nothing wrong with it.

          • copd@lemmy.world
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            4 months ago

            I’ve had two people actually crash into my house when using my driveway to turn round because they got greedy and tried to use the full length.

            If they stopped 2-3 meters short that wouldn’t have happened.

            Some people really can’t drive

            • samus12345@lemmy.world
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              4 months ago

              Okay, if people are fucking morons they shouldn’t be turning around in driveways, or driving at all, for that matter.

              • copd@lemmy.world
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                4 months ago

                Fortunately the 150 year old brick house always wins. My neighbour often puts cones in front to stop people doing it and I can’t tell you how often people crash into the cone because they didn’t see it.

                I will never be surprised by people’s driving anymore

    • Bunnylux@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      You must live in Texas lmao. Have you been to the north east? Not every street is 4 lanes wide. I absolutely need to pull into a driveway to turn around.

      • RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        No, California. Plenty wide streets in my neighborhood. Enough for cars to be parked on both sides and you can still do a 3 point turn without going into someones driveway.

        • Abird@sh.itjust.works
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          4 months ago

          Exactly his point - you have space. There are some roads where I live that you are lucky to drive your car down the road with cars parked on both sides. The other thing is, it is unsafe to turn around in the road. Using a drive way is a safer option. Finally, I really don’t want to be in your driveway, I’m there for 30 seconds at most if there aren’t any cars coming.

    • Bob@feddit.nl
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      4 months ago

      What’s the infringement exactly? To me it’s like getting pissy over someone walking up your garden path without knocking on your door.

  • Kowowow@lemmy.ca
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    4 months ago

    Pretty much the same thing when you live along a highway and someone starts slowing down near your house

  • BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    My father when turning around in a driveway would always say: “Don’t bake a cake because we can’t stay long.”

  • FenrirIII@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    My grandfather lived on a corner lot. The man hung barbed wire (with a clear sign) across his driveway. Every time we visited, without fail, we heard the sound of someone needing a paint job.